My most important performance in July
August 1st, 2010 | By admin
July was mad busy. There were a few big things to prepare for. First was getting ready for the much loved EPP performance at Nerdapalooza. Next was going to DC to one) speak on a panel and two) perform Particle Business, TEDx style. My final performance on the microphone was to be a reader in my sister wedding. The last was the biggest deal. What was rapping or speaking to scientists compare to stepping up for your family?
When I first got the call, my thought was to read Dr. Suess’s “Oh the Places You’ll Go”. That had the right vibe and cuteness and her reaction was positive but I wanted something even more unique. This is a unique bride and groom. I searched the web and even went through some Joseph Campbell writing looking for something awesome, smart, meaningful. I figured I wanted people to laugh and then cry. The internet let me down. Nothing was awesome enough.
In my 3 credit hours of Marketing, all I truly remember is “Know your target audience”. Well, the bride and groom are big baseball fans and the vows were going to actually be said at home plate of their favorite team, the Philadelphia Phillies. This led me to come across a piece called “Marriage and Baseball”. I was going going to go with that until I actually read it and thought it sucked. It was flat. I won’t even link to it. That sucky piece did inspire me to go off and do my own thing (kinda like how that dumb Souljah Boy song inspired “Milk & Doo Doo“)
Thank you all very much for being here. I know a lot of you could have been at Chelsea Clinton’s wedding in New York. Like you, I’m very excited to be here at Citizen’s Bank Park. Here is where the Phillies are supplying the bases and Al is supplying the diamond. Al. Good draft choice, Stef certainly is a catch. If I was marrying the both of you, instead of telling you “You may now kiss the bride”, I would tell you, “You may take first base”.
By the way, always touch base. Games have been lost because a runner missing touching a base. Touching base is also important in marriage. Both the physical act and communicating with each other. Communication is important in baseball. You’ll frequently see the catcher and pitcher talk. When running bases, the runners will look towards the base coaches. Communication is also important in marriage. Don’t be afraid of opening your mouth and cry “foul” if the other is being unfair. Infielders have a certain technique for ground balls. They are trained to identify the ball coming towards them, get in front of it and scoop it up. Likewise, I’d like to urge you to be on the lookout for problems. When they come your way, do your best to get in front of them to deal with them.
Al. You’re not marrying Stef for just this inning of your lives. You are marrying her past the seventh inning stretch… marks until the bottom of the ninth. Soon, you will be a team of two. Maybe in the future some minor leaguers will join your team. Just know this, Al and Stef, please see those gathered together today as your bench. If there is trouble on the field, we will clear the bench to fight for you. There are no more passionate and loyal fans than Philly fans. As such, also see us as your fans. Always know that we are all rooting for your team. I wish you luck and love and hope each of you love making it to home plate.
Now play ball!
CONGRATS STEF AND AL FROM YOUR BROTHER!





